5 Key Steps to Healing Your Confidence Through Therapy

I believe that confidence does, in fact, come to us naturally. However, as we progress through childhood, adolescence, and even adulthood, we encounter people and situations that erode our confidence. Over time, we internalize the things we hear about ourselves, which turns into negative self-talk. Think about it...when a baby is learning how to walk, do they fall and stay down? Nope! They may cry a bit, but they get back up and keep on going.

For many of us, confidence is something we have to heal before we can embody it. Whether it’s self-doubt, past experiences, or the pressure to measure up to impossible standards, our confidence often gets buried under layers of fear and limiting beliefs.

While it is normal to feel afraid, building the courage to face challenges, trust yourself, and “do it scared” is how we overcome our fears. Therapy can be a powerful tool to help you get there.

If you’ve ever wondered how therapy can support your confidence journey, here are five key steps to healing your confidence from the inside out.

1. Identifying Limiting Beliefs and Self-Doubt

The first step in therapy often involves slowing down enough to notice what’s happening in your inner world. Many of us carry limiting beliefs that sound like:

·       “I’m not good enough.”

·       “If I make a mistake, I’ll fail.”

·       “I don’t deserve happiness unless I achieve X, Y, or Z.”

These beliefs usually come from past experiences, voices we internalized from childhood, society, or unhealthy relationships. In therapy, you learn to identify these beliefs, challenge them, and replace them with healthier, more balanced truths.

It’s like holding a mirror up to your thoughts and finally seeing which ones are yours and which ones were handed to you without permission.

2. Setting and Respecting Boundaries

Confidence grows when you respect yourself enough to set boundaries. Without boundaries, you end up pouring into others at the expense of your own energy, leaving you drained and resentful.

Therapy helps you recognize where your boundaries are weak or missing and gives you tools to start building them. For example:

·       Learning to say no without guilt.

·       Recognizing what relationships feel safe and supportive versus draining.

·       Creating limits around your time, energy, and emotional availability.

This is exactly why I created Boundaries Bootcamp: to help women learn how to define what healthy boundaries look like, practice real-life scripts for setting them, and build the confidence to uphold them without apology. Because when you respect your boundaries, you’re teaching the world how to respect you too. Teach them people how to handle you, girl!

3. Practicing Self-Compassion and Shifting Negative Self-Talk

Confidence does not equal perfection. Confidence is about being kind to yourself along the way. Many of us speak to ourselves in ways we would never speak to someone we love. Therapy gives you the space to notice your inner critic and start rewriting the script.

This might look like:

·       Reframing “I always mess things up” into “I made a mistake, but I’m still learning.”

·       Replacing “I’ll never be good enough” with “I’m growing, and that’s enough right now.”

·       Practicing affirmations that actually feel believable and aligned with your journey.

The more you practice self-compassion, the easier it becomes to treat yourself with the respect and love you deserve. That’s where confidence thrives.

4. Embracing Vulnerability and Facing Fears

Healing your confidence means allowing yourself to take risks and be seen. To be honest, that takes vulnerability. Whether it’s applying for the promotion, starting the business, or speaking up in your relationships, every step outside your comfort zone is truly an act of courage.

In therapy, vulnerability is the birthplace of growth. Your therapist becomes a safe space where you can unpack your fears, rehearse brave conversations, and slowly build the muscle of resilience. The more you lean into vulnerability, the more confident you become in your ability to handle whatever comes next.

5. Building Lasting Confidence Through Ongoing Therapy

Remember how I said you’re slowly building a muscle? That’s what confidence is! A muscle that you build over time. Therapy provides the ongoing support to keep strengthening your ability to power through the moments when life tries to knock you down.

This consistent space gives you the tools to help you become comfortable with living your life as authentically as possible and the strength to power through some of the challenges you may have to face along the way.

Journal Prompts for Reflection

·       What limiting beliefs have you noticed repeating in your thoughts? Where do you think they come from?

·       Where in your life do you need stronger boundaries? What would change if you set them?

·       How does your inner critic speak to you? What’s one way you can respond with kindness instead?

·       What would you do if fear wasn’t holding you back?

Final Thoughts

Keep in mind, you’re not “faking it until you make it”; you’re rebuilding your sense of self-worth slowly and intentionally.

I know this work because I live it. As a therapist, but also as a woman who’s faced self-doubt, anxiety, and the fear of stepping outside of her comfort zone, I understand how scary it feels to begin. I also know the transformation that comes from doing the work.

Confidence is possible for you, too.